Tips for the Step Mom

How I Dealt with Jealousy

November 20, 2017


It’s something I am constantly working on.  If you had ready last weeks post on “How I Struggled With Jealousy”, you might have caught on that I am not your most secure of gals out there.  And that’s okay, because I’m working on it.

I am my own unique person.

I try my hardest not to compare myself to anyone.  This is the body that was given to me.  I have it for life, I might as well enjoy it.

I embrace the fact that I’m short, I’ll never be able to change that.  I even quite like being short.  I can wear any size of heels and still be shorter than my boyfriend.

My weight fluctuates, and that’s okay.  I may not be a skinny mini, and I know I never will be.  I like to indulge in a big plate of pasta, Taco Bell, and spinach dip.  But I also like to work out, weight lift, and ride horses.  I lose weight, and gain weight all the time.  I have curves and I have to embrace them.  I have a 32H bra size (small rib cage, big ta-ta’s), and I will forever have those curves.  My boyfriend loves my thighs, my hips, my tummy.  If he loves it so much, why can’t I?

A lion does not concern themselves with opinions of sheep.

Women are funny creatures.  We feel shitty about ourselves, so we try to make other women feel shitty too.  Although I never made my cruel words public, and some people did… I still had those thoughts, and those thoughts alone are hurtful.  Trying to bring someone down because you feel shitty, is just  shitty thing to do.  Thinking awful thoughts didn’t make me feel any better. I just displaced my negative feelings onto someone else, and they just came right back.

I no longer use negative words to describe a person.  Instead, I just think positively.  I don’t focus on their big nose, I focus on how beautiful their eye colour is, how bright their smile is.  This makes me feel better.  Positive thoughts breed positive feelings.

I’ve come to realise that people, especially women, say mean things to other people to make themselves feel more superior.  When I came to this realisation, I was no longer prisoned by the negative comments and thinking “is this true?”.  Instead, I felt sad for that person.  What they are projecting on me is their own insecurities.  Whether it be attacks on my weight, my makeup, my hair.  They aren’t personal attacks on me, they’re displacing their own insecurities onto me.

The secret…

…Is just to let it go.  You can’t change some things about yourself.  Embrace those differences and just go with the flow.  Be the best person you can be, and screw anyone who thinks differently.


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