Stuggles of a Step Mom | Tips for the Step Mom

Surviving Mothers Day as a Childless Step Mom.

May 9, 2018

The little ones are hard at work in school, creating beautiful Mother’s Day crafts.  Tracing their little hands over coloured construction paper, cutting them out to make pretty flowers out of them.  Making beautiful cards expressing love and appreciation.

Your fridge will be empty.  You won’t have a beautiful masterpiece to display.  You’re only a step mom, with no children of your own.

Yet, you mother your step children.  You kiss boo-boo’s and scare monsters from under the bed.  You read bedtime stories, cook dinner, help them with their homework, and love them dearly.  All the work you do for them goes unnoticed today.

How do you get through it?

It’s a hard day for the Childless Step Mother’s, as a lot of us feel as if we fill the role, but do not get celebrated.  We do everything a “real” mother does, the only thing that is different is the biological part.  Here are a few things that you can do that might make this dreadful day a little easier.

Celebrate other Mothers.

It may not be your Mother’s day.  However, you have many Mothers in your life.  Do something special with your own Mother, Grandmother, Aunts and friends.  Have a dinner or pedicure with just the girls and celebrate the day as women who care for little humans.

Pamper yourself.

Chances are, you don’t Treat Yo Self often.  Mother’s Day is the perfect day to do so.  Get a message, get your nails done, freshen up your hair, see a movie.  Do something nice for yourself.  After all, you deserve it.

Take a moment.

Take a moment to reflect on not only yourself, but also Bio Mom.  Even if you don’t have a great relationship, silently and to yourself, compliment her on all the aspects that make her a great mom.  Allow this day to be about you step child’s mother and all the things she has had to do and sacrifice for your step child.

Don’t get your hopes up.

You might be thinking “Maybe this year my husband/step child will finally give me something/acknowledge me on this day!”.  Stop.  If you don’t have expectations, you cannot be let down.  If they do something, that’s really awesome.  But, if they don’t, it’s best not to have any expectations to disappoint you later on.

Celebrate on Step Mother’s Day.

Step Mother’s Day is on the 20th this year.  Hopefully time lines up and you have your step children on that day and you can celebrate with dinner and desert.

Let it go.

Unfortunately, this is an aspect of life that we cannot control.  This may be one of those moments where you just have to accept the outcome, and just let it go.

Happy Mother’s Day to all Moms, Step Moms, Foster Moms, Adoptive Moms, and Furr Moms.

  1. I love this. I am a step momma who struggles with Mother’s Day greatly. Only 22, and miscarried my first child. but I now have a beautiful step daughter. Mother’s Day is always a reminder that I don’t get to be a momma because that was taken away from me. and even though I am a step momma, I won’t be celebrated either. So I needed this post. Thank you so much. Always love your posts. And happy Mother’s Day to you beautiful. You deserve it.

    1. My heart goes out to you, love. You are a Step Mom but you are also a MOM! You are a mother of a beautiful rainbow baby, who is always watching over you. Take a moment tomorrow to celebrate all your sacrifices both as a step mom, and a mother to a rainbow baby.
      Happy Mother’s Day to you too <3

  2. My heart goes out to you, love. You are a Step Mom but you are also a MOM! You are a mother of a beautiful rainbow baby, who is always watching over you. Take a moment tomorrow to celebrate all your sacrifices both as a step mom, and a mother to a rainbow baby.
    Happy Mother’s Day to you too <3

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

%d bloggers like this: